"It's a long story... When I was a kid, Santa never got me the Sergent Sascatchawand action figure I wanted."– The Mall Santa's backstory.
The Mall Santa is an overweight man with a five o-clock shadow and brown hair. He is seen wearing a ratty Santa suit.
Unlike the well known Jolly Saint Nick that he portrays, Mall Santa is a mean, ill-tempered grouch in a similar fashion to Dan. He hates Christmas (and by extension, Santa Claus) because he never got the Sergent Sascatchawand action figure he wanted.
In his debut episode, it's revealed that he is an interpretative dancer and that he's only working smaller jobs until that career takes off.
The Mall Santa Edit
In "The Mall Santa", Mall Santa serves as the main antagonist of the episode. Dan feels he is undeserving of the Santa name because he is mean, crude and doesn't celebrate Christmas at all.
Dan tries various attempts to get rid of him, from demanding he quit immediately to attempting to murder him by launching several sharp candy canes at him.
When Chris learns that the Mall Santa hates Christmas because he was never given a Sergent Sascatchawand action figure, he tries to convince Dan to help him find one and offer it to him as a gift. Dan predictably doesn't follow Chris' instructions and instead saws the Tree in the mall while Chris is out looking for the action figure.
The following morning, when Chris leaves the present for Mall Santa to find, he succeeds and the Mall Santa is driven to tears upon receiving the gift... Up until Dan shoves the giant display Christmas tree on top of him, sending Mall Santa into a rage, chasing Dan until he beats the crap out of him in front of the children.
Following his firing from the mall due to the incident, desperate for help, the mall hires Dan in his place instead.
- Despite hating Santa and Christmas, he has the job of a Mall Santa.
- According to Mall Santa, he's only working at the mall until his interpretive dancing starts getting "the recognition it deserves".
- It's implied that he has been drinking on the job when Dan accuses him of drinking eggnog, a Holiday drink that is typically made with rum, brandy or bourbon. However, the drink can be non-alcoholic so there's no way to know for sure if Mall Santa had been drinking.
- He refers to Dan as "Stinky the Naughty Elf".
- The Mall Santa is voiced by Mark Hamill, who previously voiced Dr. Pullum in the Season 1 episode "The Dentist".
"Ho, ho- eh, who gives a crap?"– The first lines of dialogue spoken by Mall Santa.
"I'm working a minimum wage job for a holiday I don't even celebrate."
"How can you not celebrate Christmas?! You're Santa!"
"I'm confused, I know you're not a child because you have facial hair. But it sounds like you ACTUALLY believe in Santa Claus."
"Of course I do! Read your Bible!"– Dan and Mall Santa, arguing about Santa Claus.