Dan Vs. Wiki

GiGundo-mart greeter "Sorry, sir. We don't do pat downs. Member's Only"

Gigundo-Mart Greeter is an unnamed employee of Gigundo-Mart.


The Gigundo-Mart store greeter is balding, has a unibrow and a stubbly chin.

He is seen wearing a Gigundo-Mart uniform which consists of a long sleeved white t-shirt, a green bow-tie, an orange vest, a black belt and light brown pants.


The Gigundo-Mart greeter is smart, and incredibly strong. Despite this, he is really old, is frequently seen coughing and wheezing, and is prone to sleeping on the job.


His first appearance is him throwing Dan out of the store after Dan tries to run in because he didn't have a membership card. The Greeter, catches him running in very easily and has Dan trapped in a choke hold and claims "That's how we did it on San Juan Hill".

Dan later stole a membership card and claimed it was him to the Greeter. The Greeter was skeptical but Dan said he had liposuction last time he was there, The Greeter accepted this answer and allowed Dan in... Only to have Dan kicked out again soon after because he was making outrageous claims about Gigundo-Mart on the intercom. ("Exposure to Gigundo-Mart may cause dizziness, headache, nausea, and an unnatural attraction to bison or elk-" and he was cut off by the Greeter choke holding him again.)

When Chris helps Dan sneak in to Gigundo-Mart, Dan steals a forklift, the Greeter catches him and uses a bigger forklift to chase Dan in one of the most epic chase scenes in animation history.

After chasing each other with forklifts, the Greeter knocks Dan out of his after they fight with the claws on the forklift, and he pins Dan against a display of paper towels, Chris cries out Dan's name, only because he wants paper towels. Dan aggressively throws a pack of paper towels at Chris, and then the entire tower of paper towels floods the store and Dan gets knocked outside the store once again.

Later, when Dan steals a shrinking ray from Elise and begins shrinking things inside Gigundo-Mart, the Greeter comes to stop him. The Greeter throws a large object at Dan only for Dan to shrink it and it just barely hits him on the head. The Greeter realizes what's about to happen and starts running away from Dan as he shrinks various objects in the store.

Elise, (who is tiny and was trapped in a jar on a shelf by Dan), pushes the jar over and lands on Dan's head, knocking him out. Elise enlarges herself, and points the ray at the Greeter, who has his hands up in the air. Elise instead enlarges a can of cheese blast, which falls on the Store Greeter, which causes him to give up and take his break.

Without the Greeter to do his job, Elise begins shrinking everything inside the store, which makes customers leave, and she eventually shrinks the store itself.


When Elise shrunk the entire Gigundo-Mart store and gave it to Chris as a gift, it's revealed she accidentally shrunk the Gigundo-Mart Greeter to, who is seen coming out the tinier store, and yelling unintelligibly at Chris and Elise. Chris thinks it's not real and says "Look it even has a tiny man inside!". As the Greeter, is seen walking back inside the store, Elise says "oops" and the episode ends.

It's unknown if the Greeter was put back to normal size and got to return to his normal life.


  • The Greeter is seen choke holding Dan and claiming he learned it from places including San Juan Hill, and The Beaches of Normandy.
  • Despite being old and frail, he can throw Dan across a parking lot.